Wednesday, October 25, 2006

DON

I was finally shaken up out of my lethargy to post a review of a movie I consider the biggest disappointment of this year.

Farhan Akhtar, who did a brilliant job in Dil Chahta Hai and Lakshya has been one of my most favorite directors and storytellers. Though I am not a fan of SRK, one cannot deny that he has a huge following and can carry off arrogance really well.

With the two of them coming together, and the taut script of DON to help, I had little doubt in the success of the venture. My only misgivings were regarding the choice of film, as DON was hardly in need of a makeover. The original movie is still contemporary, unlike other Amitabh movies like Zanjeer or Adalat. Sholay; for that matter is not contemporary, but you don't fiddle such a huge movie, period (Especially RGV, who has been kidnapped and substituted by an impostor who has become a quote factory for the media, rather than a movie factory).

Coming back to the new version of DON; we have SRK preening for the first half an hour, mumbling and butchering all the punch lines from the original.
Chunky Pandey has a cameo, but exits too soon to provide any value to the movie.

We have a cop Boman Irani doing a Flash based presentation for unenthused Malaysian cops where he gives a hodge-podge description of an entire gang of drug pushers.

Kareena does her dance routine with Yeh Mera Dil to entrap SRK, trying to ooze oomph. She succeeds to an extent, but also shows oozing fat out from her short dress.


For the next half hour, SRK moves around trying to push dope like a street peddler as opposed to the high profile goon he is supposed to be.

Boman Irani is hot on his trail, and finally manages to ensnare DON.
Here is where Farhan Akhtar the scriptwriter makes his first mistake. Instead of faithfully copying the original, he tries to show some originality and goofs up big time in tying the ends till the climax.

You have cops who double up as mafia dons, some FACE OFF and CON AIR inspiration and inanities galore.
No doubt the entire execution is pretty slick in terms of visuals; but the story lacks soul. There are no genuine emotions, nor do you feel for any of the cardboard characters. All you can hope for is a quick end to the stupid farce being played out.

Arjun Rampal steps in for one of his worst performances from a threadbare repertoire, and hams full-time.
Priyanka Chopra and Isha Koppiker have roles of less significance than the one played by Rajpal Yadav in Jungle.

Pawan Malhotra does a decent job as DON's henchman, but is criminally neglected.
All the songs except Yeh Mera Dil come as interruptions, and can be easily cut without affecting the end product.

If the original DON had been re-released on the same weekend as this remake; it would have made a killing, and shown this one as the farce it is.